HARD WORK, THE PRINCIPAL THING IN MARRIAGE

MARRIAGE IS HARD WORK! !!!!!!


I used to interpret the saying "Marriage is not for small boys" to mean small boys in terms of age, until I visited a female mentor that has been in marriage for 47 years.

I asked, so what is the secret of your love over 47 years in marriage?
Beaming, she retorted; My son, the expectations you bring into marriage will either spell its doom or success. I married my husband without expectations of enjoying his money or buying cars for me, but with time, my patience, hard work and God-fearing attitude yielded results of getting cars, houses, taking care of our children and all that.

You see, if a married lady keeps on nagging in the house, she pushes the spirit of her husband from the home. If you make the man unhappy, you make the house uncomfortable.

So, I married without high expectations from my husband but simply to make him happy always.

Yes, for the past 47 years, I would be the first to get up from bed and the last to go back to bed. I bath the kids, do devotions with them, prepare breakfast for my husband and boil hot water for him to bath. I iron his clothes he would take to work, kiss him and wish him the best in his daily endeavours.

I asked my old woman, so then what does the man do in return? She laughed all heart and hearty and replied; You see, this is the mistake you young ones make in marriage.
YOU DO SOMETHING TO YOUR HUSBAND OR WIFE AND EXPECT SAME REWARD FROM HIM OR HER, THIS IS WRONG!

When it becomes your attitude to always please your husband or wife, the other person responds naturally. Indeed, if nothing touches the palm tree, it doesn't rattle.

She continued, my son, never carry how rich or poor your family is into marriage. After all, you knew very well the status of your family and decided to marry that man or woman.

Love only compels would- be couples into marriage but it doesn't sustain marriage. Rather, understanding, patience, communication and most importantly, forgiveness sustain every marriage. High expectations are the symptoms of divorce in marriages.

Sometimes you hear, I want to marry a mother, a business partner, God fearing person etc. You can't get all your expectations in one person. With time and depending on your relationship, you may get some. So minimise your expectations in marriage.

To cut the long story short, as too much cook spoil the broth, she concluded on the mistakes couple should resist at all cost in marriage:

1) Never say you have made your wife or husband somebody from a nobody. It hurts. God only use you as an agent for transformation, give the glory to God.

2) Let the man be head financially, emotionally,
physically and spiritually, whilst the woman exercise diligence in the use of the tongue.

3) Children are not the ultimate in marriage. They are given to enhance your marriage. When God delays in giving you a child, have every reason to live a happy marital life.

There has never been any automatic barrenness in a person. Abraham got Ishmael at age 86 but at age 100 and 90, they eventually got their Isaac. Isaac had a barren family for 20 years but eventually got his twins; Jacob and Esau etc.

4) Sex is a major morale booster after a hard day's stressful life. Try to be sexual beings and not "Angels" in that marriage

5) Resort to God often and less to men to solve your marital disputes.

6) Let the women " Make up" their characters much more than they make up their body.

Indeed, marriage is not for small boys because small boys struggle to forgive, demand everything speedily, lack the patience to wait, have so many friends etc.
Make every effort to let that marriage work and may God help us.


The power of "I am sorry"


"I am sorry",a short but mighty sentence!

If you wish to live long, don't joke with this short sentence, "I am sorry." Do you know how many people who had gone to early grave because they neglected the therapeutic power of "I am sorry".

Single sorry can stop a war, n prevents millions of men, women including children from dying!

Most of the troubles in most homes are heightened because wives are too big to say "I am sorry" to their husbands and you can trust the ego of  husbands in saying same to their wives.

Quarrel lingers between friends because no party wants to say *I am sorry.* Each says or asks, why should I be the first to say *I am sorry?* He or she would beat his or her chest and utter the ego phrase, *a whole me!*

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the part of the world where saying *I am sorry* is a hard nut to crack while curses are easily unleashed.

Welcome to the part of the world where people refer to a person who says *I am sorry* in a midst of a rift as a *weaker sex*: one who is not man enough; one who is foolish.

Welcome to Africa where saying *I am sorry* is tougher than forcing a donkey to pass  through a needle hole.

All of us are victims of this discussion. We have lost valuable assets, money and even lives because of this cheap and affordable sentence *I am sorry.* It simply cost only a breath of speech.

Have you ever wondered why domestic violence is less pronounced in the western world? It is simply because they understand the efficacy of *I am sorry.*

Husbands say it to their wives and even children whenever they err, wives and children do the same  and life goes on fine.

Friends, this is simply a piece to encourage us to cultivate  a habit of saying *I am sorry.* It is difficult but readily affordable.

Learn how to say *I AM SORRY* even if you are right.

Wiseinfo: An attack in the church again!!

Wiseinfo: An attack in the church again!!

An attack in the church again!!

 THE Anambra State Police Command, yesterday, invited the chairman of Ekwusigo Local Government Area, Mr Ikenna Ofodeme; President-General of Ozubulu Town Union and Chairman of Ebubechukwuzo Foundation owned by Aloysius Ikegwuonu, Mr Jovita Ofomata, over last Sunday’s shooting incident at St Philips Catholic Church, Ozubulu in which many worshippers were killed and many others injured.

This came as Ofomata said the person suspected to be the target of the Sunday attack, Mr Aloysius Ikegwuonu, was never a drug baron as being insinuated in some quarters.
This came as Yoruba socio-cultural group, Oodua People’s Congress, OPC, condemned the Sunday’s killings, demanding that those behind the coldblooded slaughter be immediately unearthed and brought to justice.
The three indigenes of Ozubulu were questioned on what they knew about the people being associated with the incident and other issues relating to the personalities suspected to be involved in the crisis.
Their interactions with the police, Vanguard gathered, lasted less than one hour.
Ikegwuonu not a drug pusher —Ofomata
Describing Ikegwuonu as a very kind man, Ofomata said: “I am surprised at what people are saying about him. He is one man you will meet, and you would like to meet him again. It is through his foundation that he built the Catholic church where this incident happened. That is not the only Catholic church he has built.
“Two other Catholic churches, St Aloysius at Eziora Ozubulu and St Francis at Egbema Ozubulu, were also built by him. Through this foundation, he has helped so many people and also granted scholarships to many students in Ozubulu and beyond.
“What happened on Sunday has left us in a state of confusion and up until now, I must tell you that I am convinced that the act is a terror attack.
“There are so many stories flying around which are not true. People are saying there is a problem between Ebubechukwuzo and some other people and I can tell you that is not true, because till now, he has not lodged any complaint that he has a problem with anyone.
“So I don’t know where that information came from. People say he is a drug lord, and that he took money belonging to another gang. So many stories, and I can tell you that we are even confused where some of these stories are coming from.
“What I can only say about this, is that we will leave the police and other security agencies to do their work, and we urge them to do it well, and I believe the outcome of it will help us to know what happened.”
Nature of his business
On the nature of his business, Ofomata said: “He is an estate developer in South Africa. He has built so many houses even here in Nigeria and sold them. He is also into property management, and he is an importer. He deals on beverages, spare parts, which he imports from China. Ebubechukwuzo is not a drug pusher.
“Concerning when he will be back, I can tell you he will be back by next week. We told him what happened and he is surprised and he will be coming by next week to take care of his father’s corpse.”
It’s shameful, sacrilegious —OPC
In a statement in Lagos, yesterday, by Founder of OPC, Dr. Frederick Fasehun, the group described the massacre as shameful and sacrilegious.
He said: “The killing of these innocent worshippers is one incident too many. Happening in that serene rural environment, it demeans all Nigerians. It shows that nowhere in this country is safe. There is total breakdown of law and order in Nigeria as a whole.”
He urged investigators to solicit the assistance of the International Police.
“Perpetrators must be speedily brought to book. If there is an international connection to this callousness, as Governor Willie Obiano and the Commissioner of Police have said, then the assistance of Interpol must be solicited to extradite those concerned back to Nigeria for investigation, prosecution and conviction.”
OPC commiserated with the Ozubulu community and the families of those who lost their loved ones in the attack. The organisation lamented that Nigerians lived in constant fear from assassins, kidnappers and insurgents.

It said: “This country has now entered a state of anomie where life is short and brutish. Nowhere appears to be safe: Not Lagos, not Port Harcourt or Akure or Maiduguri or Jos. If Nigeria is at war, let us know. Government may just as well declare the entire Nigeria a war zone.”
They’ve attacked God —Okorocha
Also, yesterday, Governor Rochas Okorocha of Imo State described the killings as a direct attack on God.
Okorocha was quoted in a release to newsmen by his Chief Press Secretary, Mr. Sam Onwuemedo, when the representative of Pope to Togo and Benin Republic, His Grace, Most Rev. Brain Udaigwe, paid him a visit at Government House, Owerri.
The governor added that the situation had taken a criminal dimension.
According to the release, “those who carried out the attack had directly attacked God although the gunmen had succeeded in killing and wounding some people. It is a matter that has taken a different criminal dimension and never experienced in our recent time.
“The governor of Anambra State has told me that there is a clue to who committed the crime and I have suggested that the culprit be immediately brought to book and make to pay for what he has done.”
On the issue of Ahiara Diocese crisis, Okorocha asked the Pope to take decisive action.
He said: “The issue of Ahiara is of great concern to Imo people. There is no better person to communicate to the Pope than you. I have been to Ahiara on several occasions preaching the gospel of peace.
“The matter in Ahiara has gotten to the point of
ego and egoism and this is the time for the Pope to take the rightful decision and restore peace in the area. I know what is wrong but this is not the time to discus who is wrong or what is wrong in order to save the Christians in that part of the world.”
Don’t rush into conclusion on cause of shooting— P-G, Ozubulu Town Union
Also, speaking, yesterday, President-General of Ozubulu Development Union, ODU, Dr Ernest Chukwuka, said: “I called a meeting of Ozubulu stakeholders and there we decided on some of the things we will do. I must confess that we are not happy, we are mourning, this is a great shock to us, and it will take some time for us to come out of this shock, but with God on our side, we will come out of it.
“One of the things we decided to do after our meeting, yesterday, is to visit the victims and give them some assistance.
“As we are visiting them in the respective hospitals where they are being treated, we are getting their names and their villages, and we are still going to visit the mortuaries where the corpses are kept.”
Asked to comment on the alleged business dispute between their sons in South Africa that was brought home, which allegedly resulted to the shooting, Dr Chukwuka said he was not aware of such dispute.
He said: “We are still investigating, people should not just jump into conclusion, nobody can give account of what transpired that led to this attack. We cannot even tell you that this is the cause, or that is the cause, we are still investigating .”
What is your say on this ??
  THE Anambra State Police Command, yesterday, invited the chairman of Ekwusigo Local Government Area, Mr Ikenna Ofodeme; President-General of Ozubulu Town Union and Chairman of Ebubechukwuzo Foundation owned by Aloysius Ikegwuonu, Mr Jovita Ofomata, over last Sunday’s shooting incident at St Philips Catholic Church, Ozubulu in which many worshippers were killed and many others injured.

This came as Ofomata said the person suspected to be the target of the Sunday attack, Mr Aloysius Ikegwuonu, was never a drug baron as being insinuated in some quarters.

This came as Yoruba socio-cultural group, Oodua People’s Congress, OPC, condemned the Sunday’s killings, demanding that those behind the coldblooded slaughter be immediately unearthed and brought to justice.

The three indigenes of Ozubulu were questioned on what they knew about the people being associated with the incident and other issues relating to the personalities suspected to be involved in the crisis.

Their interactions with the police, Vanguard gathered, lasted less than one hour.

Ikegwuonu not a drug pusher —Ofomata
Describing Ikegwuonu as a very kind man, Ofomata said: “I am surprised at what people are saying about him. He is one man you will meet, and you would like to meet him again. It is through his foundation that he built the Catholic church where this incident happened. That is not the only Catholic church he has built.
“Two other Catholic churches, St Aloysius at Eziora Ozubulu and St Francis at Egbema Ozubulu, were also built by him. Through this foundation, he has helped so many people and also granted scholarships to many students in Ozubulu and beyond.
“What happened on Sunday has left us in a state of confusion and up until now, I must tell you that I am convinced that the act is a terror attack.

“There are so many stories flying around which are not true. People are saying there is a problem between Ebubechukwuzo and some other people and I can tell you that is not true, because till now, he has not lodged any complaint that he has a problem with anyone.

“So I don’t know where that information came from. People say he is a drug lord, and that he took money belonging to another gang. So many stories, and I can tell you that we are even confused where some of these stories are coming from.
“What I can only say about this, is that we will leave the police and other security agencies to do their work, and we urge them to do it well, and I believe the outcome of it will help us to know what happened.”

Nature of his business

On the nature of his business, Ofomata said: “He is an estate developer in South Africa. He has built so many houses even here in Nigeria and sold them. He is also into property management, and he is an importer. He deals on beverages, spare parts, which he imports from China. Ebubechukwuzo is not a drug pusher.
“Concerning when he will be back, I can tell you he will be back by next week. We told him what happened and he is surprised and he will be coming by next week to take care of his father’s corpse.”
It’s shameful, sacrilegious —OPC
In a statement in Lagos, yesterday, by Founder of OPC, Dr. Frederick Fasehun, the group described the massacre as shameful and sacrilegious.

He said: “The killing of these innocent worshippers is one incident too many. Happening in that serene rural environment, it demeans all Nigerians. It shows that nowhere in this country is safe. There is total breakdown of law and order in Nigeria as a whole.”
He urged investigators to solicit the assistance of the International Police.
“Perpetrators must be speedily brought to book. If there is an international connection to this callousness, as Governor Willie Obiano and the Commissioner of Police have said, then the assistance of Interpol must be solicited to extradite those concerned back to Nigeria for investigation, prosecution and conviction.”
OPC commiserated with the Ozubulu community and the families of those who lost their loved ones in the attack. The organisation lamented that Nigerians lived in constant fear from assassins, kidnappers and insurgents.

It said: “This country has now entered a state of anomie where life is short and brutish. Nowhere appears to be safe: Not Lagos, not Port Harcourt or Akure or Maiduguri or Jos. If Nigeria is at war, let us know. Government may just as well declare the entire Nigeria a war zone.”

They’ve attacked God —Okorocha

Also, yesterday, Governor Rochas Okorocha of Imo State described the killings as a direct attack on God.
Okorocha was quoted in a release to newsmen by his Chief Press Secretary, Mr. Sam Onwuemedo, when the representative of Pope to Togo and Benin Republic, His Grace, Most Rev. Brain Udaigwe, paid him a visit at Government House, Owerri.
The governor added that the situation had taken a criminal dimension.

According to the release, “those who carried out the attack had directly attacked God although the gunmen had succeeded in killing and wounding some people. It is a matter that has taken a different criminal dimension and never experienced in our recent time.

“The governor of Anambra State has told me that there is a clue to who committed the crime and I have suggested that the culprit be immediately brought to book and make to pay for what he has done.”
On the issue of Ahiara Diocese crisis, Okorocha asked the Pope to take decisive action.

He said: “The issue of Ahiara is of great concern to Imo people. There is no better person to communicate to the Pope than you. I have been to Ahiara on several occasions preaching the gospel of peace.
“The matter in Ahiara has gotten to the point of
ego and egoism and this is the time for the Pope to take the rightful decision and restore peace in the area. I know what is wrong but this is not the time to discus who is wrong or what is wrong in order to save the Christians in that part of the world.
Don’t rush into conclusion on cause of shooting— P-G, Ozubulu Town Union
Also, speaking, yesterday, President-General of Ozubulu Development Union, ODU, Dr Ernest Chukwuka, said: “I called a meeting of Ozubulu stakeholders and there we decided on some of the things we will do. I must confess that we are not happy, we are mourning, this is a great shock to us, and it will take some time for us to come out of this shock, but with God on our side, we will come out of it.
“One of the things we decided to do after our meeting, yesterday, is to visit the victims and give them some assistance.
“As we are visiting them in the respective hospitals where they are being treated, we are getting their names and their villages, and we are still going to visit the mortuaries where the corpses are kept.”
Asked to comment on the alleged business dispute between their sons in South Africa that was brought home, which allegedly resulted to the shooting, Dr Chukwuka said he was not aware of such dispute.
He said: “We are still investigating, people should not just jump into conclusion, nobody can give account of what transpired that led to this attack. We cannot even tell you that this is the cause, or that is the cause, we are still investigating .”


Courtesy : vanguard newspaper

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